shibbylog

BlogTarded

2009-02-27T13:03:00.000-08:00

Yes, ok, I know...

You want pics, and they are here.... but for some reason, whenever I put pics in my blogs... everything starts going to like quadruple spacing (see: All blogs with a pic)... I don't know what it is, or why it does it... and I'm not even sure if it will do it this time... but we'll see... know that "Yes, ok, I know..." should be separated by 1 space from this paragraph... but ... here goes...

Oh, and this text was supposed to be at the top...

These photo's were taken by my uber talented Cousin Laura Savage Wheeler, I believe I have her linked over there ----------------------------------------------------------------->

I will also be shamelessly plugging her in my other blog, as I have to catch up on all things media, and her "business" will absolutely fit into that category.

GUYS!!!!

2009-02-27T08:28:00.000-08:00

And of course by "guys," I am referring to the 2 of you that read my blog...

I was just so excited about the prospect of a new post, that I had to shout GUYS! in all caps and everything.

Soooo, In case you haven't heard... I have a daughter, and of course by "a daughter," naturally, I mean the most; Outstanding, Beautiful, Funny, FAT, Smiley, Sweet, Precious of daughters.

So to recap, in case you haven't heard... I have the most oustanding beautiful funny fat smiley sweet precious daughter OF all time. I know I know, that there are some of you (the 2 of you who read this) that either do already have a daughter, or may have one in the very near future, are thinking, "Hey buddy, what about MY daughter???" Valid point, yes: Relevant, NO ;)

Juuuuuuust kidding, I have alotted a few words just for such an occasion, I mean, all the good things can possibly be consumed my one of MY children. (yes, yes they can). The following are words that your respective children can "outshine" my little one at:

Nonpoopy
Nonspitbubbleblowy
Nonwobbly
NonTOOcute (don't get me wrong, this kind of cute is quite dangerous, such symptoms include but are not limited to; drowsiness from losing sleep while staring at baby, income definciency, rapid time elapses, fatness due to lack of motivation to exersize when too focused on baby, wobbliness, slobbermouth kisses, blindness in ONE eye, etc...)
Nontimewasterbysleepingallthewaythroughthenight...er (Such a waste of time, honestly, where did we go wrong here)
Nonsuspiciouslyquietand"good"inallsituationsincludingpublicvenuessuchasrestaurantsandbowlingalleys...er (who wants to spend their days having to be suspicious of their 3 month old, I mean, what is she up to really?)
NonFAT
Nonfootballlover

See! Now who can say I don't play fair?!?! I mean, really, I might as well be venting about my poopy spitbubbleblowy wobbly TOOcute timewasterbysleepingallthewaythroughthenight supspiciouslyquietand"good"inallsituationsincludingpublicvenuessuchasrestaurantsandbowlingalleys nonFAT footballliving Daughter, rather than "bragging" about her being the most outstanding beautiful funny fat smiley sweet precious daughter OF all time! I mean, come on people, read between the lines here. Obviously this is a cry for help, and on the information superhighway of all places! Will you answer the call, WILL YOU???

Top 10 reason this Fall rocked!

2008-12-08T16:13:00.000-08:00

10: I "Rep'd" 200+ lbs for the first time in my life

9: I haven't worked out since (I have a good excuse I promise)

8: I won 2 games in the regular season of the Church Fantasy Football league I'm a part of (that's like, wayyyyyyyy more than Detroit this year)

7: In the same Church league, I am still undefeated in Fantasy Basketball :)

6: I have been in Utah, California, Arizona, Illinois, North Carolina, Virginia, Colorado, Maryland, & Washington D.C.

5: The Jazz are still "in the black" despite an injury riddled opening to the season

4: BYU lost to TCU

3: TCU lost to UTAH

2: 48-24 (Pay attention to #'s 3 & 4 and you'll understand :) )

1: Milo Brynlee Mecham, 5:35p.m., 11/11/2008 (Veteran's Day), 6 lbs 14 oz, 19.5 Inches, perfect.

This picture covers 1 & 2, 1 because it's a picture of our beautiful little girl about 2 minutes after she was born. And 2 because she managed to depict exactly what I was doing toward all BYU fans November 22nd.

I'm sorry if you think the picture is a little too "racey" for your liking, but it's by far my favorite.

Her [Milo's] Mother was amazing throughout the delivery, what a champ. Just when you think you couldn't think a person couldn't get more amazing and/or inspiring, she pushes a 7 pound human through her "Vah J J."

As a dad, I find my self utterly smitten with this little girl. My heart smiles everytime I think about her. My ears twitch at the sound of her breathing. And I know that her big beautiful eyes can see straight into my soul when she looks at me. What a special blessing.

And did I mention that the Utes beat BYU, mmmm.... all the blessings....

"Tek - NO - Law - GEE"

2008-08-25T12:53:00.000-07:00

The dictionary defines TekNOLawGEE "Inventions to keep the "slow" in touch with the "not dumb" I think it's pretty clear which category I fit into here, seeing as how I can blog from my PHONE (that is what I'm doing now) and it still takes me a friggin month to "post."

This is going to be a small one folks seeing as how, I am on my phone and at work, but i wont leave you without a little treat...

TekNOLawGEE
is so good to me
that I cant believe
it's so hard for me
to update my blog
without any delay
please do forgive me
thats what I pray
this poem's a stretch
but that's cuz I'm beat
so it's all you get
for your little treat

The End

p.s. if you actually think that is the real definition of TekNOLawGEE, step right on into my "slower" group

The End.... again

10 Things I Hate about my brain...

2008-07-24T13:20:00.001-07:00

1. What was the title again....
2. Oh yeah, stuff about my brain I don't like
2. So did the first ones count
6. Yes
8. I forget what I'm doing by the time I start
9. I love sports
10. What was the title again?????????

Basically what I'm trying to say is that I get distracted easily, but these distractions are not necessarily limited to shiney things (though I do like shiney things), but mostly my own brain comes up with a new thought, a new "directive" immediately after I just embarked on the previous directive.

Example: I go downstairs to do laundry, when I come back up, here is a list of things that I have now done.

1. Gone back up stairs to get some cereal
2. Remember that I went downstairs to do laundry
3. Go back downstairs
4. Beat RockBand
5. Twice
6. Run upstairs for a Soda
7. Go to Wal-Mart to get Sodas
8. Come home with 6 cases of water and a Men's Health magazine determined to change my ways.
9. Go to Sev
10. Get Big Gulp of Pepsi
11. Beat RockBand again
12. Start blogging about my brain
13. Wave to Kristen as she comes down to start some Laundry
14. $&*%!!!

And that folks, is juuuuust about every day of my life. You see now why I'm so bad at blogging... it's not that I don't want to, or "forget." No, it's that I plaaaaan to do it. And this folks is why I hate my brain.

All that being said, I plan (you know what that means) to start writing in this and my other at least weekly, and work from there, please forgive me for depriving you all (3 or 4 of you) of the entertainment that is, my blog (now it's zero of you).

Man I must interview well....

I can't seem to Focus
And I don't know why
Nothing seems to stick
no matter how hard I try
I can remember numbers
like a friggin computer
but my brain changes lanes
like a pissed of commuter
So all I have to say about
I still love sports
the end...

DAD-Vertising

2008-05-23T13:32:00.000-07:00

Ha! Take that Missy with all your fancy play on word cleverness (yes, it took me like 3 days to come up with that but HA anyway) ;)

Anyways... It's arrived everybody. The opportunity to witness an underappreciated sport by people that are not only good at, and look UNBELIEVABLE doing it, but also happen to love the sport. And it's all coming to you on network television.

Ok, so I'm not as good at the formatting with the blogging and all that, but I'm gonna spread the message believe you me.

May 25th, 11:00 pm

They are hunters folks, are you sure you wanna test how good they are by not watching this Sunday night. Just kidding (but really).

Take it from the guy who's been on the other side. If there was a tree, I was huggin it. I have actually been quoted that "I would take a bullet for a duck." And yet here I am, spreading the word to the ENTIRE WORLD (the 8 people who read my blog...counting me) on the Internet Machine, because they've got me "hooked" (that's funny cause it's a play on fishing so laugh).

And don't get me wrong folks, it's not that I still don't hug trees, I come to you a more educated individual. If it weren't for people like these fine Mecham boys, we wouldn't have the wilderness around us that we so enjoy. So let's give back to them in support, what they bring to us is AWESOMENESS by tuning in this Sunday night. But really you should check out Missy's (my sister BTW) entry because it absolutely TRUMPS mine :) Here's a link to her's http://www.melissacartersblog.blogspot.com/ titled "Papa-ganda" (dam... that is good (it's not swearing cuz I spelled it wrong))

292 minutes...

2008-05-20T11:57:00.000-07:00

That's right folks... That is how long it took me to travel 26.22 miles on nothing but the feet God gave me. Am I satisfied you ask? NO! Why? While I did beat Oprah's first marathon (and SHE had a personal trainer), I was totally smoked by my running partner Ashley, who beat me by a clean 30 MINUTES and was no where near my personal goal...but... In my defense, I am fat and quite lazy... so... THERE!

Here is a little breakdown of marathon day...

3:45 am (yeah, this is a relevant moment, which should have been my first sign that this was NOT what I was built for:)) Wake up...

4:00 am Ashley and I left for Ogden

5:00 am Load onto the "Full Marathon" bus, that's right folks, not the half, not the relay, but the BAMF Full Marathon bus :)

5:40 am Arrive at the Starting point...pee

5:41 am "squished" our way in between people to get as close as you can to one of the flaming barrells, where I met a nice lady by practically spooning her for a favorable spot by the fire...

7:00 am BANG!! The Race begins

I'm moving into mileage and time...

After 5 miles, I'm feelin good folks, I've got a 8:40 pace and zero fatigue.

At about 11 miles, I see my favorite sign being held by a little girl that said, "Toenails are for Sissies" at which point I became extremely apparent of not just my toenails, but every single part of my body...that little brat ;)

At the halfway point (13.1) We were at about 122 minutes, doing AWESOME! So well in fact, I thought, let's do that again...

Except that the next 13.1 miles were not as easy, as I watched my running partner sail up the only real hill as I hobbled my way sloppily towards the top, that is where I started thinking, this is absolutely no fun at all :)

When I finally got to the top, I took a quick Port-O-Steve stop (I don't like the actual name), and took off my cut-off that was like an oversized sponge at this point, and kept goin.

Now I was at mile 17 at a little after 10:00 am and was having that argument between my brain and legs from my blog a ways back, and I'll tell you what. The marathon arranger people must have known that this was a hard part, cuz this is where people really started getting into it. Here was the reward, people cheering you on, telling you how awesome you are even though you are trying to get out of the way of the octogenarian's that are completely dominating you. And this is where aid stations came at every single mile.

I finally got a little extra inspiration when a guy who had to have had at least 200 pounds and about 30 years on me passed me up wearing a t-shirt that said, "if you can read this, I'm not in last place." ... .... Yeah, that's all I needed to get me through the last few miles.

Stay in front of that guy, that was my new goal.

And finally, the final stretch, about 6 blocks away was the finish line, but I still couldn't pick up the pace. I kept "see-sawing" with a couple who had probably been married for about 200 years. Then, at 22nd street (I was finishing at 25th), there was my mom cheering me on, at 23rd I saw my beautiful wife who even got in and ran for a sec with me giving me an extra boost. Then my Dad (Tim) halfway down that block. At 24th, there was my running partner, who looked like she had time to shower, take her kid for a walk, go hit a bucket with her husband, and get her hair done by the time I got to that point... At which point, I finally found a little extra, and full on sprinted that last block.

Now it's 3 days later... not sore... feel good, except for one minor thing to remember for next time... I am completely FRIED (Sunburnt). Look at something red, I could be hiding in that spot right now... scared (you should be). I can't even go get myself a massage because it's so bad, putting on a shirt is more painful than miles 17-26 combined... so dumb... the wife tried to warn me. I was all like, don't tell me my BUSINESS woman, and now she is all like SUCKA, I told you so... and she did. I keep telling her that she needs to remind me how she is always right... Never-the-less, Kristen has been very sweet to put Aloe on my back even though she tried to help prevent it in the first place... I couldn't have done all this without her support.. Thanks Baby...

But the moral of the story is...

I did it. But I'm not done folks, I'm not happy with 4:52:15 (this is the first time I've disclosed this by the way). So mark it on your calendars folks, April 18, 2009. Salt Lake City Marathon. Ashley is not going to be able to run this one (she hopes, and I'll let her tell you why), so it won't count for that little battle, but I fully intend on kickin my own @$$ in #2.

I ran a marathon

in under 5 hours

which basically means

I have super powers

I'm not sure yet

If I'll use them for good

But it is cool to know

that I could if I would

but first things first

A killer costume I need

So tell me what you want to see

your ideas I will read

I totally beat Oprah

Which basically means

that all of her accomplishments and charities and money is not as me cool cuz I did better so THERE!

The End

Remember the time...

2008-03-20T16:42:00.000-07:00

...that I totally sprained my ankle playing basketball in the midst of my Marathon Training...

Yeah, that sucked... The good news is that I did it whilst scoring the winning point of our final game for the night over a dude much bigger (not hard to be) than I. It was a nice little floater that I don't shoot often (don't shoot, or don't make, hard to keep those straight sometimes) immediately followed by landing on the big guys foot (immediately followed by a few choice words [well, one word {over and over again}]). Being the incredibly macho manly man I am, I walked out of there like it was cool (hobbled out like I just had my foot amputated almost in tears). When I arrived home (yes, driving was interesting), my wife (the sensible one in the family) insisted that we go to the hospital. Again, basking in my manliness I refused, until I took off my sock and there was a baseball where my ankle bone used to be. That's when I turned to Kristen and said, "you know babe, I think I should go somewhere like the hospital (I'm so smart)." Long story long, I have a bad high ankle sprain and it sucks...

In further news, I have another blog... I know what you're thinking (he can't even take control of one blog). The other one is an outlet for my hobbies... You see, I am so easily entertained, that I like virtually everything. I'm talking Movies, Games, Sports, Video Games, Art, Artisticly done Video Game Movies... So here is what I'm hoping, this will be an opportunity to try and learn how to write entertainingly...

So here is what you should expect from the other blog, almost daily reports (sometimes multliple times a day) on Movies I watch, Sports I watch, or a Video Game I played... and I'm even hoping to do some illustrations for the blog along the way (we'll just have to see on that one). Your (whoever actually reads this crap) job is to comment, for real, on my writing, or your opinion on the particular subject of the writing so that I figure out I should probably stop trying... The blog is called shibbopinionitous (pronounced like you'd pronounce a disease). And the website is shibbysopinion.blogspot.com... I'll try to keep it entertaining... And now what you've all been waiting for...

A poem to read

to keep your spirits high

and my feeble attempt

to make you think I'm a cool guy

I know it probably seems

like I'm stealing this beautiful work

but it's all me folks

the end

Weeks of Change, Tragedy, and New Beginnings

2008-03-12T14:04:00.000-07:00

Let me just start off by saying... "wow!" I have good news, bad news, and just news (not necessarily in that order). So when you finish reading this update (in like an hour:/), I'll be expecting a call if I haven't talked to you already...

So, the bad news. We lost our son, our little (not little) rambunxious (no idea on the spelling there) puppy (puppy). Oakley was by far the most energetic dog I've ever encountered. Full of spirit and happiness. You couldn't look at this dog and not see that he was already planning his next adventure. Unfortunately, he planned his last one (on this earth) on Feb 21st, 2008. He was an incredibly smart dog, and for the umpteenth time, figured out how to get out of the back yard. He headed to his usual "rebel" spot, the park a block away. Where I'm sure he was going to catch and bring home yet another nasty pheasant. When on his way he was struck by a car, I'm told by witnesses that it was very unlikely that he felt anything or even saw it coming, which means he went to Doggy Heaven with that same floppy tongue grin he constantly wore. We really loved that beautiful dog, and he will be sorely missed.

Sorry to start it off on a sad note, but I thought that was better than ending on a sad note... know that you should be as happy as we are that his life was filled with nothing but raw excitement and energy, that puppy "lived," no question about it.

Now for the "news" portion, which I hope to be able to lable (that rhymed he he) good news soon. I ....... AM....... NO............LON.......GER........IN.........B-A-N-K-I-N-G!!! It's true, for those of you who know me at all, I've never really worked in any other industry. So this is a big step for Kristen and I. Let me just say that the last bank I worked at, sucked, I don't want to give it away, so we'll just call it C Bank... no no, that's too obvious, let's call it Chase B... That's better. Talk about giving banks a bad name when it comes to nickle and diming, ridiculous... so let's review good banks and bad ones (trust me I know).

Bad = Wells Fargo, Bank of America, Chase, Key (Sorry person I know that banks there), Deseret Credit Union, Zions

Good = WaMu, US Bank, America First, Mountain America, Etrade (online) various in network credit unions such as intermountain and the school districts....

The former banks can afford to charge fees everywhere because of their "private" clientelle (which still pay those fees somewhere, they usually just don't know it because their interest payment vastly outweigh the fees).

The latter are focused on building "relationships," the whole package. They know if you like them at the bottom, you'll use them at the top (or at least should).

That is all for my banking lesson this week, there will be a pop quiz on Friday (is it still a "pop" then you ask? ... let's move on).

I now work for IntegraTelecom, which basically does the same thing that Qwest does, but for businesses, my shameless plug is that we do what Qwest does with a better quality, and attention to detail AKA, we actually analyze YOUR business, not just your business demographic, and if we make sense, then great, if not, also great, we both move on knowing we are doing the best we can be.

Now .. for the good news... the news that those of you who have suffered through this blog so far are all waiting for... the news that you all wish I would get into and stop introducing it as the news that you are waiting for while you are waiting for it.. That News!

... .... .... Drum roll please (if I was at home, I'd totally drum roll on Rock Band right now, and I'd do it like it was cool, ... because it IS cool)... ... continue fake drum roll....

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

WHO GIVES A #@%$ WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!!!

It's true, this is not some cruel joke, though I would expect those from me often, this one is for real... for those of you pissed that I didn't call to tell you, get over it! There are like a thousand people to call!!! I'm sure you'll understand or else you are a weeny :) Though I DO expect YOU to call or at least text, cuz if you didn't, you'd really be a weeny :) *snicker* According to the flawless information system known as the "inter" "web" our due date is Halloween of this year! I say "our" like I'm having the baby, poor Kristen, I can't even imagine... pushing a baby... ummm... out... yeah, nope, not for me, GOOD LUCK BABY! We accept donations in the form of Cash, Check, or Charge, ha ha ha I'm just kidding, I'd never accept checks....

And now for the poem

by now you should "knoem"

they never do rhyme

most of the time

while hardly making sense

and making you tense

cause you want it to end

Or else you will send

me straight to the ground

with a loud thumping sound

and all the while

I laugh while I smile

cause you're still reading

whilst I am bleeding

The End

Man-Crushes and Splinties...9

2008-02-04T21:16:00.000-08:00

It's ok everyone, I'm okay. I'm back, the party can start! Brace yourselves... but not really, well, really I am back, but you don't need to brace anything or worry about a party.

Do you guys remember the time that the lowerest seed in the NFC ever to make it to the CrapperBowl defeated the most powerful team to ever play the game?!?

Or how bout the time that A guy on the Jazz set/tied a record for the most 3 pointers in a quarter (this has happened three times, but one was VERY recent (today)). P.S. it was Kyle Korver, man someone should have called that he was going to be the best addition since Hornecek right from the get go before Korver even put on the Jazz uniform... OH WAIT, I DID!!!! (p.s. Kristen thinks that I have a man-crush on Korver, mainly because I do... but it started before he ever took a shot for the Jazz... and that makes it better for some reason... ... k... soooo.... anywho.... remember when that OTHER Manning won the MVP in the CrapperBowl?!?)

Now, on to the training... yeah, I separated "on" and "to" WHAT! Last week was a shorter run at 5 miles, but I did want to touch on the primary battle of last week that I discovered that I have with my self. This battle is my brain and my legs fighting over whether I should run faster, so as to not run as long... or slower, so as not to destroy my legs. My brain usually wins this one, and my legs then remind me that I have splints... in my SHINS!

Surprisingly, this weekends run did not quite have the same conflict once I began running. The major conflict was WHEN to run. You see, I have one of those pesky "job" things, so the Saturday morning run was out of the question, and I have one of those even more pesky "calling" things, so Sunday morning was out too... Fortunately, Saturday afternoon was supposed to be pretty nice out... even more fortunately, My EQP (that's Mormon for EQP) called me and said that the Sunday morning meeting was cancelled, so then we could put off the run til then, but MOST fortunately..est, I think a snowflake fell out of the sky at about 6:04 in the morning, so clearly running at 8:00 was out of the question (too dangerous). It was beginning to look bleak, like I might actually miss a long run after a very weak week (sounds funny) of training. (I only ran 2ce instead of 3 times). But this is where a partner comes in handy, and in annoyingly, she had this "great" idea that we could run at the Olympic Oval after the CrapperBowl (you know, the one where the lowerest seed in the NFC ever to make it to the CrapperBowl defeated the most powerful team to ever play the game?!?)... so that became the plan, after a few soda's, a delicious serving of Pizza and Cheese filled bread from The Pie, 2 packs of Gushers and a Poptart, I was ready to run 9 miles at 9 o'clock on a Sunday night.

So there I was, heading out to the Olympic Oval, and on the way there I began to think, I thought the Olympics were in Salt Lake City... I was beginning to realize I was very wrong when I hit Bangerter, and still had a long ways to go yet. Then the vibrate from the phone caught my attention, and when I looked down, Kristen's adorable little face was lookin right back up at me. I thought, oh, how sweet, she's called to wish me luck again on my journey. So I answer with a smile on my face, when she delicately tells me I'm an idiot by saying... "you forgot your shoes." It didn't take the upbringing of a feminist to realize that the woman was right in this situation as I look down at the pitiful old skater shoes on my feet. "Luckily" I had a pair of basketball shoes in the car (at least 4 different voices in my head at this time remind me that basketball shoes and my running in them = my Shin Splinties to begin with) Then 2 voices remind me out loud. But I was all like, PSH... I'm a Man. And busted out those 9 miles like it was COOL! (It wasn't cool).

I gotta say, the Olympic Oval was a very nice facility, but I also dressed thinking, shoot, I'm a runnin indoors. I can finally not wear tights for my run, along with my awesome 6 year old basketball shoes, all the while thinking, didn't Apollo Anton O...something win a medal here for something, oh well, I'm sure it will come to me. It did, in the form of a Giant freaking Ice Rink. I was like... "oh" and was cold. But then I reminded my self that I'm a MAN, despite constant protest of that fact from my oh so encourging partner ( I wont name names, for now we will call her A Wolfe (hehe), no that's too obvious, so we'll stick with #@$@#$). In all reality, the run felt quite good (I can't walk today, but I'm still a MAN), I never really struggled to keep going, I even did a "cool" little kick thing to a kids soccer ball when it came bouncing out of their little indoor field. (it was impressive I promise, until the 9 year old slapped me and told me never to touch his soccer ball again).

So there you have it folk (no "s" on purpose). That is the update of the last couple of weeks. Man, somebody really should have called that Korver was going to be the difference on the Jazz, like, within hours of finding out we got him... if only that happened... that would have been cool, and that guy would have been a genius... and maybe later been inspired to run a marathon out of nowhere, and start a blog or something... yeah, he'd be cool. Now, for another poetic JEM to cap off this long update.

Roses are Red

Violets are Blue

Yeah, so okay, I may have a Man-Crush on Korver cuz I totally called his success right from the get go but I think it's pretty freakin justified since he 3 balls like it's cool (it is cool) and I'll give $5 dollars to anyone who can guess what correlation the way I spelled gem wrong above might have to me or my blogs or my passion for Korver and long poems that don't actually rhyme but just keep going on and on until people are all like " what the crap kind of poem is this, I mean honestly, first you throw out all this junk about Iambic Pantamowhatever, and then you drop this after your little lovenest story of some White Basketball player dude...

Violets are... Blue....

The End

SE7EN

2008-01-21T11:28:00.000-08:00

So, to start, I apologize for not posting anything lately, I know you were all waiting up at night clicking the little "refresh" button on your computer's over and over again to see what I'd write next, and to see what new exciting run-on sentences I could actually manage to just keep "running on" without any final punctuation in sight regardless of how many times it actually appeared that a "period" or "Exclamation point" would be placed appropriately?

Anyways! I have also learned that the template graphic of two of the most influencial Actors in probably the most influencial film of it's time, may have a slight reference to violent situations. As a result, I have modified my backround to make sure no one (Jaye :)) is offended.

Now on to the topic at hand, "SE7EN." (did you see the clever use of the Number 7 in the word Seven). It refers to my week #2 long run. This one unfortunatly did not run (pun intended) quite as smoothly. You see, I've had a little (lot) of trouble with shin splints as of late. Yesterday, I thought I'd try something different to help out. I taped both of my legs from from the Knee to the Ankle, I thought this would help keep my musles in place but I must have done it a bit too tight. About 1.7 miles into my run, my knees were on fire and my thighs felt like they were going to buckle. Then nature decided to call (I had to pee)... well, when I ran off to the side of the road and stopped to ummmm... answer nature, my legs were no longer able to support me. It wasn't until I was stopped and toppled over that I realized the source of the problem. At that moment, my calves seized up and suddenly felt like somebody was hitting them with a bat, a bat made of lead covered in broken glass while my legs were already on FIRE. I started ripping the tape off of my freshly shaved (yup) legs, and it was like a breath of fresh air. Once that tape was off, I had another battle, this one was much more difficult, the was the battle to continue. Then I remembered my running partner was probably about a half a mile ahead of me at this point and I wasn't about let her get the best of me. 5.3 more miles later (1.7 was already taken care of at that point.), we were at the finish line. I won the battle with my brain, the hardest test I've had so far.

I also need to give thanks to my lovely wife and her help taking care of my splinty legs, after a couple of bubble baths and calf massages, my legs are already starting to feel much better. So Kristen, thank you.

Anywho, for those of you still left reading, I'll leave you with another poetic treat.

Roses are Red,

Violets are Blue,

Pulp Fiction really was a very violent and disturbing movie and I was just giving Jaye a hard time I don't actually endorse that movie, I just actually liked that scene because it was pretty dang funny,

The End...

I Did it!!!!!!

2008-01-12T08:57:00.000-08:00

I wolfed down that Emu like it was COOL!!! I have to give a little shout out to my running partner Ashley for the added support, it helped a ton! Also a little shout to UnderArmor for really proving why their crap is so expensive, it works, and it's amazing. Here's how it went down,

Mile 1. 8:04 a.m.

Jon's Brain: "What the @$&# are you doing!!!???!!"

Legs: "I'm with Brain, What the H-E-Double Hockey dude"

Mile 2. 8...something (no longer keeping track at this point)

Brain: "You can turn back now, it's not too late!!!"

Legs: "you're a bas#$#%"

Mile 3.

Brain: ".....(brain workin slower).... ummm.. great, REAL great! now no matter what we do... we're screwed, 3 miles forward... 3 miles back, I'm out of here!!!"

Legs: "No fair! we don't get to stop until you stop him!!!"

Mile 4.

Brain....done

Legs.... Pissed

Mile 5.

Brain: "You know, this could happen, this idiot may actually carry us there."

Legs: "No dummy, it has to happen or we don't get home, and WE are carrying us there!"

Mile 6.

Brain: "Shoot Yeah!!!"

Legs: "I hate you and your friggin brain!"

So there you have it, my body came together in glorious...ummm.... harmony. Now, off to Village Inn for some buttery pancakes, a Dr.Pepper, and some pie.

The first test...

2008-01-12T05:40:00.000-08:00

Alright kids... it's here.

I'm looking at my clock, it is 6:40am, which means if I were in Hawaii... I'd still be an idiot for waking up before noon on my Saturday off...

But all that doesn't matter, I'm just about to go on a 6 mile run. I have never run 6 miles in a row, the only time I ever came close was in Moab with my family almost 6 YEARS ago when I ran 5... not too mention it was Moab in March, not Salt Lake in January.

My John Dad (by the way, to both "Dads" involved, I hope you understand that the name reference is simply to avoid confusion to the MASSES that read my blog, and not some twisted form of discrimination) asked a very good question in my comments section about the Marathon in reference to a marathon... He asked, "How do you eat an elephant? Wait... who would want to???" .... noted. In the mean time, I'll keep training and when that day comes, I'll stuff my face full of Elephant, but today... it's an Osterige (Osterige? Osterige? Osterige?)... or maybe an Emu (Osterige?) that I'll be devouring...

Shibby???? What the.........?

2008-01-09T22:35:00.000-08:00

Shibby

The Origin...

I'm not sure that people reading my blog will get too far past the "shibby" word... without knowing a little about it's past... It's nothing fancy, it just happens to be from the only movie to ever win an Oscar for BEST MOVIE EVER MADE!!! I know you are asking yourself, What great motion picture art have I missed out on? Well, the truth is, this movie didn't quite make it to the Oscars, or the theatre for that matter. The movie is quite stupid actually, yet this word, this beautiful word (shibby) just seemed to stick with me. It was their (the people in the movie) favorite word, it was their word for "cool," or "sweet." Long story long, it became my bowler name, and blew up from there. It has been my licence plate, the name of my first car, pet, and is the origin of just about every password I have ever had to use (trust me, you don't want to try to guess any of them). For those of you brave enough, maybe drink 1 or 2 bottles of cough syrup, pop in "Dude, Where's My Car?", and enjoy the ride.

Disclaimer: Please do not actually drink 1 OR 2 bottles of Cough Syrup, or you will die... an idiot.

Also, any and all Grammatical, Punctual, Spelling or other English class things I didn't do well in type items that appear in the above written statement, or any statement that is written, whether above or otherwise, is postioned strategically at all times for thematic elements and dramatization, which also goes for Run-on sentences that primarily talk about B.S. so as to cover any and all Grammatical, Punctual, Spelling or other English class things I didn't do well in...

The Challenge going forward... and the Marathon

2008-01-08T22:31:00.000-08:00

Since I was a kid, I always thought it was pretty incredible the amount of Marathons my Tim Dad has run (ran? runned? ranned?). So I always told myself that I would at least match that number as a tribute to his commitment to health. Well, I'm running Marathon #1 on May 17th! Crazy huh?!? I officially started my 18 week training with a 3 mile run today, and think I might actually go through with this, so keep your calendars open so you can be witness to the Finish Line/Funeral that I will be the star of, either one should be a doozy (duzie? doozie? duzy?).

But Jon, you said "The Challange going forward... "AND" the marathon." So what is the challenge if a marathon is not challenge enough?

I'm glad you asked (you did ask). The real challenge going forward is our little (huge) Oakley. For those of you who don't know, Oakley is our Siberian Husky dog. He is incredibly beautiful, he has a brown and a blue eye and should cap out at about 60 pounds (I'm pretty sure he weighs about 900 right now). Lynette Mom was nice enough to get us some very needed training for our boy. He's never been bad, or aggressive, just very... VERY hyper. So we just needed some tips to get his nerves down. It hasn't taken long to learn that we are his pet, not the other way around. But so far it has gone very well, and I think as long as we stay consistent, Mom's generous gift will do wonders for my little family.

Well, I've written a lot today... sorry, I'm a rambler, but I will leave you with another little gift. Even cooler than yesterdays killer poetic beauty.

If you read carefully, and in the right timeframes, and meter

and if the words are organized differently, and changed completely, then

my entire post can be read in Iambic Pentameter (Aembyc Pantanometor? Shakespearian Writing Poemy Thingy? Retarded thing I had to learn in school but never actually understanded what the crap the teacher was talking about no matter how many time she made me read "Romeo and Hamlet" or whatever? (is that like the Brokeback Mountain of the Renaissance or something????))

Anywho, goodnight!!

I have officially joined BLOG nation!!

2008-01-07T21:38:00.000-08:00

That's right folks, I gave in. I'm the ultimate conformist.

I have 3 hotmail accounts, 2 Yahoo accounts, 2 MySpace accounts (between my wife and I), 2 XBox Live GamerTags (shi66y & xGR1Fx for those interested), a Facebook account... AND NOW my very own BLOG.

I actually think that this will be the best contribution that I have to the Internet Machine, as one or two of you may know, I'm not exactly the best person to try and contact or get a call back from. For that I apologize, but for my first action on my new found blog duty, I will officially announce my #1 New Year's Resolution for the year 2008 (Starting right now).

I WILL RETURN ANY AND ALL CALLS/TEXTS/WALL POSTS/EMAILS BY THE END OF THE DAY RECIEVED, NO EXEPTIONS.

For those of you who don't know already, this is a pretty big commitment for me. And I truly think that this will bring me closer to my family and friends.

P.S. I don't know if I'm supposed to write blogs this way.. (as though I'm talking to an audience) but you're still reading so I guess it works. Well, I'll leave you for now, but not empty handed, here's a little poem to get you on your way...

Roses Are Red,

Violets are Blue,

Did you know that Now Blogger saves your drafts automatically!

that's cool...

The End...